Is It Lopsided?

The beginning of the year is a good time for sorting and organizing things, and the relationships in your life are no exception.

Over time, friendships naturally cycle through various phases, and sometimes the friends involved end up no longer being in sync with one another. This most often results in a lopsided or non-reciprocal friendship.

I like to reflect on the friendships of mine that seem to be fading. Is that friend going through a period of intense life demands with increased age or health-related family responsibilities? Is their work or home situation requiring considerable time and energy? If so, I am supportive and patient.

But if not, I remember that all our friendships are not alike. There is a wonderful poem by an unknown author that starts ...

People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.

Some friendships are sustained throughout our lifetime. Others reflect seasons of closeness in our lives (college, work, etc.) and end when there are no longer shared interests. Others may end when one friend changes and grows in a direction that is different or no longer in sync with the other friend.

Whatever the situation that brings about a diminishing friendship, moving beyond the painful feelings created by lopsided reciprocity is an opportunity for psychological growth and a prompt to explore new interests and form new friendships.

This Week's Focus:

This week, take an assessment of your friendships so you consciously begin the year putting your energy into the ones that really matter. Let go of the ones that have served their reason or season so you have time to explore new interests and form new friendships.